How Couples Can Recover From 'Intimate Relationship' Breakups?

This couple certainly share the bliss of an intimate relationship.

Relationship brings much laughter, fun and enjoyment. Some enjoy very intimate relationship. But like every other good things that come to an end, love comes to an end for some. What happenes when the relationship turns sour?

Being heartbroken sucks big time. Especially when you love someone so dearly and then something happens and you lose that person. Some run after, some just stand watching as he or she vanish into thin air. Those who experienced it wish it never happens again. Some recover from heart breaks quickly. Others take time to heal all the wounds.

My personal experience inspired me to write this hub and I hope it helps you. For me, it happened four years ago. But the pain is so real. Though I have moved on, the memories are unforgettable. I stood watching as she packed her belongings and walked out the door. I thought my world has come to an end. Loneliness and guilt overpowered me. I felt a very sharp pain that only my flesh can describe better if it were to talk. All of a sudden I realized I was so tiny in the whole universe. I wanted to run, cry and just die because the pain was so intense. Time has certainly healed my broken heart but it wasn't without effort. Here's some of the things I did to climb out of the deep tunnel life threw me into.

Understand why it happened.

In order to overcome a heart break, you have to know why it happened. You have to very honest with yourself and seriously determine cause of the breakup. This is going to be more painful but you have to if you want to live a normal life again and not being haunted by the shadows of your ex.

Things like gifts, photographs and mementos are good reminders of ones appreciation of their love one. But when a relationship breaks, these very things do more damage than we imagine. They constantly remind you of your ex. Every time you see these things, you are remained of the good times you had together with your ex and then you regret losing him or her and that becomes very painful.

Avoid going to places you use to go with your ex.

If there was spot that you normally went out with your ex, Was it a restaurant, shopping mall, cinema or a particular spot were you and your ex use to watch sunset. Don’t go there. Why? You will only be making your pain severe if you visit those spots and be reminded of your ex. So stay away from it for now. You can still go there after you have fully healed your broken heart. Avoid music and videos you use to listen or watch together with your ex because they bring back lots of memories.

Don’t try to contact your ex

Remove all the contact details of your ex. Emails address, phone numbers, face book etc. Never ever try to contact your ex because if you do, you might hear what you don’t want to hear. You will only injure your heart further so don’t try.

List all the bad qualities of your ex

Some people don’t agree with these but I think it only helps you get on with your new life. Knowing the bad qualities of your ex lover will help push you away from him or her.

Writing is not only for publication. Writing opens the door to your heart. Heart breaks are so painful that no word can describe how one feels. Writing is like therapy to some. Some people write to express the pain in them. Write poems poetries and songs or eve a novel if you can. British psychoanalyst and author Darian Leader explains how creative works poetry, drama and literature helps a person get over sad times:

Go out and socialize

We tend to think a lot when we are alone. Avoid being alone. Those that isolate themselves from others during sad times like these are so vulnerable to suicidal thoughts and actions. Our thoughts easily get distracted when we are out with other people and doing something we like doing. Take up sports or visit family or friends. Develop interest in what others are doing.

Expect new Love

The law of attraction says, what you think about a lot eventually manifests. So expect new love to come into your life. Think back to the very first time your ex lover set eyes on you and fell in love with you. What were your looks and attitude like that attracted your ex. Work hard to regain that status back.

Final words

They say time is the healer but if you don't make an effort to heal yourself, you will never recover from broken heart. Change will only come about if you desire it and work for it. If you find this hub useful and want to share your experience or give more advice, please do so